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2014-11-22      Why Does the Government Employ Anit-Government Kooks?   

It seems among groups of professionals are individuals who could be described as clinically insane. I almost lost my cool with a guy who was yelling insane right-wing-nut bullshit at a Border Patrol agent doing his job.

I will never get why a disproportionately high percentage of people who work for the government insist that government employees are all parasites living off the work of decent hard-working Americans.

I guess irony is subtle to some.

2014-11-05      The Greatest Generation   

I love the way a claim can be considered fact merely on priority. I spent nearly 14 years in the Army between the National Guard, the Regular Army, and the Reserves. Yet I am not a soldier. But because someone once said, "once a Marine, always a Marine," every FORMER Marine claims to still be a Marine until death. Similarly, Tom Brokaw decided that the people who came of age in time to participate in WWII were "the Greatest Generation." Well, I say "the Greatest Generation" sucked. They did alright by themselves, but they also spawned the "Baby Boomers." Or, as I call them, "the Rube Generation."

We are living through the greatest period of peace and prosperity in history, yet a sizable fraction of the world's population still lives in squalor.

Why?

Because most of the Baby Boomers were middle class in a booming economy. A generation taught to look up to the most spoiled of their peers. Thus did they grant the rest of us the brilliant Ponzi scheme of Reaganomics or, more precisely, bullshitonomics. The generation that clawed its way out of the great depression and defeated the combined might of the Axis powers mollycoddled their progeny into blindly following the most pathetic of lickspittles (such as Mitch McConnell) and electing the most resolutely lazy human being ever to infest the Oval Office in the vacant visage of the Lesser Bush.

Yes, the claim can be made that the immediate members of your lineage aren't much better. These were called "Generation X" by some horse's ass trying to sell heavily horseshit-infused dead trees. But their successors were the shittiest of all.

My only hope for this largely worthless bundle of the excreta of various ungulates is that some day, the ratio of non-piece-of-shit Millennials to piece-of-shit Millennials will exceed 1 in 5.

It didn't yesterday.

2014-11-04      New Career?   

I'm sure there exists some sort of drug that greatly mutes the ability to feel empathy. That could be very useful in the case that a person, say, wanted to become a token Hispanic to shill right-wing talking points on the cable news networks. Of course, this hypothetical person would also have to be the "Hispanic friend" of an uncomfortably large number of wealthy people. That probably involves showing up to stupid events for the entire duration. Ughh. It would probably also require accepting suggestions such as "Don't hide your accent, I'm sure it's charming." and to "Why don't you show us one of those Latin dances your people do?"

Well, it beats working. Because, you know, if Hispanics are anything it's lazy.

2014-11-02      Election Time   

If you are not filthy filthy rich (net worth of several million dollars), and you vote Republican this election, you are stating as loudly as possible the following:

"I don't hate [women/minorities]. I just think they should know their place."

If on the other hand you are a multimillionaire voting Republican, then why not take the next logical step?

"Eduardo Saverin, the billionaire co- founder of Facebook Inc. (FB), renounced his U.S. citizenship before an initial public offering ..."
Quit pretending this country is anything but the host to your parasite. It is strange that so many of the leeches draining the wealth and health of this nation shriek so loudly and hysterically that the filth of the country (read: all but a few hundred obscenely rich people) should accept their lot.

Their toadies share the basic message: "The rich are rich because they deserve to be rich. The poor are poor because they deserve to be poor."

But they go a step further: "I don't mind being defrauded by the wealthy (mostly wealthy through inheritance), so long as those worse off lose more."

2014-10-06      Facebook is Mostly a Vector for Crackpot Conspiracy Theories   

I wish people would quit using Facebook as a burst-transmitter for the following:

  1. Stupid conspiracy theories

  2. Anti-science bullshit states as "common sense"

  3. New Age drivel on star- or fantasy- backgrounds

  4. Quotes stolen from religious greeting cards on religious greeting card backgrounds

  5. Racist/sexist bullshit stated as "common sense"

2014-09-26      I'm Sure They're Lovely   

New reports make me believe that I am substantially different from most people. I think Jennifer Lawrence is cute-but-dopey and nothing like, say, Catherine Zeta-Jones. As well, Anne Hathaway has her charms, but is also a little bit non-human looking. Similarly, Scarlett Johannson and Mila Kunis are attractive, but not Halle Berry attractive. Is it really just me? Or is it just that our media opt to make these individuals the center attention by declaring them "it girls?"

2014-09-13      The Fate of the Senate   

Much recent electronic ink has been spilled in recent days on the possibility of the Democrats retaining the Senate in the 2014 election. It will not happen. Money talks, and the Citizens United decision means those with money can effectively drown out the voices of the filthy peasants. To be fair, each dollar in bribe money has a return on investment of hundreds or thousands of dollars, so it makes good business sense. And since "corporations are people" ...

2014-09-11      So It's 9/11 Again   

I have but one thought on the subject.

To all of you that spent the months and years after a single terrorist incident shitting your pants or, more importantly, enticing others to shit their pants at the merest mention of swarthy persons of a certain ... type:

Take heart. You and your ilk are only the second most pathetic, miserably, barrel scrapings on the planet. The most pathetic are those poor wretches that carry out the tasks your kind are too chickenshit to carry out yourselves.

Fear not. So long as the most powerful profit so greatly on the willingness of the oppressed to accept the claims of their oppressors that a third party is responsible. Then a cozy relationship develops between the "enemy" organizations, wherein each profits from the attacks of the other for propaganda purposes.

You have a long and bountiful future ahead. So sail on, malevolent parasites. Sail on.

2014-09-08      Quit Using Our Words   

Often I hear a drooling political prostitute use the vernacular of science for moron-baiting purposes. Among the techno-babble words recently acquired by the anti-intelligentsia is "optics."

The book on optics (Opticks, as he wrote it) was written by Newton himself. Optics is the science of light. "The way morons will see it, if properly guided by my propaganda" is not functionally equivalent. Is it that the words "perception" and "appearance" have too many syllables? Optics is a fairly narrow area of study. I mean that it is very specific, though many would argue that its vast and growing set of applications shouldn't be called narrow. Screw those guys. Within the field, the word "optics," when not applied to the field itself, generally refers to items such as filters, lenses, and mirrors. In what way is this similar to "appearance?"

But I guess it sounds educated to the sorts of people that prefer the airheads who deliver their daily dose of bovine excreta to sound smart.

It beats having to listen to actual smart people who will almost certainly disagree with their preferred delusions, I suppose.

2014-09-06      When "Idiot" is an Acceptable Political Persona   

I don't think it would be particularly controversial to call George Bush, Jr. somewhat less than brilliant. But the odd thing about him is that he felt compelled to act dumber that he actually was. He was smart enough to stumble through Ivy League schools, which implies he was at least above-average. But he put on a silly "poor ol' Texas boy what ain't got no fancy city-boy edgy-cation" affectation.

Now your average doctor can excuse Bush, Jr. by telling himself, "The 'Good Ol' Boy' shtick is for the rubes, Bush, Jr. has actually had a quality education. He's just using it to get elected, whereafter he will spend his rare work hours pushing through laws designed to transfer wealth from the filth to the deserving rich."

Fair enough. But to what else does this sort of play-acting give rise?

Obviously oblivious morons like Christine O'Donnell and the clearly deranged Michele Bachmann come to mind. Today, I saw a quote from Representative Joe Barton (R-TX): "Wind is a finite resource and harnessing it would slow the winds down which would cause temperatures to go up."

Faux morons like Bush, Jr. give rise to real morons like Joe Barton.

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